Food Job: Ice Cube Carver

Gläce Luxury Ice is a meticulously designed and differentiated ice brand specifically designed for use in premium drinks and cocktails. The Gläce Mariko Sphere is a perfectly spherical 2.5-inch piece with a melting rate of 20-30 minutes. The Gläce G-Cubed, a symmetrical 2.5-inch cube, has a dilution rate of 20-40 minutes. Gläce Ice pieces are individually carved from a 300-lb. block to ensure flawless quality and a zero-taste profile, never contaminating the essence of premium liquors and drinks.”


They’ve been featured in drinks at Playboy parties, the Pebble Beach Concourse d’Elegance, and “uber-lux” car shows, and are now part of Sysco’s restaurant distribution chain. The company maintains that the true power of their cubes lies in “tastelessness.”


Stephen Colbert agrees. “When you spend 75 dollars for a bag of hand-carved ice,” the host told a studio audience, “that is totally tasteless…it’s conspicuous consumption: an hour later you’re literally pissing your money away.”

This post was written by Zachary Crockett Follow him on Twitter here

If Cows Could Swim

cowYou’ve heard about this new theory about butter?

It seems we have to update our nutrition knowledge (AGAIN).

So. There was this scheme called ‘The Great Cattle Reef Project’. The idea was, if we could teach cows to swim underwater, they’d stop producing all that milk and cream and butter and cheese that nobody wants anymore and instead make Omega 3 fatty acids that we’re all crazy about.

(Just checking to see if you are still listening…)

2013: The A-Z Food Year That Was


Airline food: There was no more pie in the sky. High in the clouds didn’t translate into haute (cuisine).

Amuse bouches were crafted to be picked up with our eyelashes. Mini morsels of oxtail perched on a sliver of sardine, topped with two petunia petals were presented as an itty bitty “gift” from the chef. A tasting menu in deed!

All socially responsible consumers and food companies hailed appetite for Fair Trade.


Bacon became the next sizzling fad. Bacon lipstick, bacon (de)oderant, bacon dental floss, bacon ice cream and other bizarre foolishnesses streaked along the highway of absurdity.

Bees buzzed off. Many feared there would be no more almond joy.

Broccoli was not adored properly. Continue reading

Brand Manager

Marcus Samuelsson, age 41, owns 6 restaurants, wrote 2 cookbooks and a memoir, appears (very) frequently on the TV, featured with full pages in the New York Times on Sunday…featured in Food Arts…employs 700 people…unintentionally leaves most of us in the dust?

When we think of Ben & Jerry we think of caring philanthropists who produce super ice cream. We think of Starbucks as earth-friendly folk who generously provide health benefits for their employees and make high priced coffee that is sold in a paper cup.

These images are creations of marketing experts who have specialized knowledge within specific fields.

A culinary brand manager understands the demographic profile of food television viewers, analyzes food trends, researches packaging innovations and coordinates the strategies of advertisers especially when it comes to “personalities” of the Anthony Bourdain genre.

Anthony Bourdain said, ” “Few things are more beautiful to me than a bunch of thuggish, heavily tattooed line cooks moving around each other like ballerinas on a busy Saturday night. Seeing two guys who’d just as soon cut each other’s throats in their off hours moving in unison with grace and ease can be as uplifting as any chemical stimulant or organized religion.” (His current net worth is estimated to be $6 million.)

How to Become a Brand Manager | › Job Search & Employment

Something Fishy

HuffPost has a fascinating report today about a Chicago Chef who is building huge aquarium for fresh fish service.

Prime Minister Putin said it is easier to make a fish stew from an aquarium than an aquarium from a fish stew. This observation could loosely be described as inscrutable.

When The Four Seasons restaurant opened in New York City in 1959, the kitchen housed a salt water AND a fresh water fish tank and contracted farmers and hunters to supply fresh foods!

Ideas float too.

Food Job: There are two categories of chefs who work at aquariums, zoos, botanical gardens and museums.  There are those who feed the animals, and fish, birds and plants, and others who are responsible for providing meals for the staff, the Board of Trustees, thousands of school children, visitors, volunteers and guests at formal fund raisers.


Cleaning Up After Irene (and Lee)

Taliaferro Farm by Roy Gumpel, Chronogram

Chronogram Magazine is a fascinating magazine. Its mission is to report on the arts, culture and spirit of the many upstate New York counties abutting the mighty Hudson River, namely Ulster, Dutchess, Greene, Columbia, Orange and Putnam counties.

It also champions the farmers of the Hudson Valley, who cultivate the the rich and fertile soil formed by glaciers aeons ago.

While some Valley residents grumbled about sitting in the dark without electricity or water for a couple of days in late August, it was the farmers who truly suffered the wrath of Hurricane Irene (and later, Lee’s’) wrath.

The waters here have now receded to their former levels but the farmers are still suffering. The fruits and vegetables they grew and whispered to and nurtured from tiny seeds have drowned. Their once fertile fields have fallen silent and there are few outward signs of life.

To put this in stark terms, and to quote Brian K. Mahoney, editor of  Chronogram:

“Ulster County’s devastation was on par with a one-hundred-year meteorological event…Three thousand acres of vegetables were ruined in Ulster County alone. Taliaferro Farms in New Paltz lost 80 percent of its crop. At RSK Farm in Prattsville–the true ground zero of the flooding damage–not only was there total crop loss, but “Potato Bob” Kiley lost all his topsoil as well. The Schoharie Creek rose and swept it all away, leaving only the bedrock underneath.

For those of us who care about farms, the agricultural apocalypse visited upon the Hudson Valley and Catskills is a call to arms. Farms are not just a scenic addition to the landscape but an integral part of our communities–primarily as sources of locally grown food whose provenance we can be sure of, but also as a robust sector of economic activity…”

I have met some of these farmers in the many local farmers markets I visit from spring to late fall. I’ve munched their juicy apples and savored their baby greens, just-dug potatoes and newly harvested tomatoes and berries.

Simply because Irene has left, we still need to chip in,  clean up after and help the farmers who have fed us with their bounty. I urge you to visit Chronogram‘s Farm Aid page, to see how you can help the farmers buy the seed and soil and move on from this meteorological event.

This is the time to value the hard work and dedication of  farmers everywhere and contribute to co-ops wherever we live.